Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Randomize
