even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
