Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize