if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
