i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
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