just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
