there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
