yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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