i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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