i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
