You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize