when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize