On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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