it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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