Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
