The maid of honor just puked.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Randomize