Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction. http://tfl.nu/io12
  Replies (2) Good night (741) Bad night (761)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (808): It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex. http://tfl.nu/n6q7
  Replies (29) Good night (547) Bad night (4307)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick. http://tfl.nu/b0h6
  Replies (19) Good night (4689) Bad night (1982)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool? http://tfl.nu/8wpx
  Replies (15) Good night (6670) Bad night (1471)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over. http://tfl.nu/mynf
  Replies (1) Good night (1852) Bad night (946)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n http://tfl.nu/8mzg
  Replies (10) Good night (839) Bad night (4681)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time http://tfl.nu/8x6u
  Replies (6) Good night (3004) Bad night (781)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (808): There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude http://tfl.nu/nnq9
  Replies (2) Good night (1451) Bad night (638)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.” http://tfl.nu/qxku
  Replies (9) Good night (1106) Bad night (1455)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?... http://tfl.nu/7sdw
  Replies (7) Good night (653) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms http://tfl.nu/wx24
  Replies (10) Good night (1189) Bad night (682)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat http://tfl.nu/hcj2
  Replies (1) Good night (793) Bad night (519)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (865): I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole http://tfl.nu/7gdi
  Replies (7) Good night (509) Bad night (970)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung." http://tfl.nu/1h35
  Replies (14) Good night (1715) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that http://tfl.nu/lub4
  Replies (3) Good night (261) Bad night (442)

Randomize