Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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