How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize