He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
