Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Randomize