ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
