Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
