your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
