Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
