they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Someone signed my nipple.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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