Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
this boner is exhausting
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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