Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
