You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
