I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
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I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
The chlamydia really affected his face.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
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Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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