my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I think my moral compass just broke
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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