Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
wrigley field is MILF paradise
dude i'm inner monologue high
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
