Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
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