I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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