I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
