Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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