yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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