I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
