mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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