Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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