Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
