if you like me you must not know who I am
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
