let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
