So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's blow job season.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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