I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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