Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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