I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
