either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize