walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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