I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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